Dear Egyptian Guys,

1. If you think you can only attract girls by showing off material possessions like your watch or your car, then you can count on attracting the kind of girls Kanye West sings about.

2. When you cuss every two seconds, it doesn’t make you look manly. It just makes you look like a pitiful attention seeker.

3. If you don’t mind guys who smoke but think girls that smoke are whores, then you have a sexism issue going on and need to get punched in your private parts.

4. If you see a girl getting harassed and decide not to step in, you’re a pussy.

5. The bigger your car, the more it shows that you’re overcompensating.

6. The way you treat your mother shows how you will treat your future wife, so don’t be a dick.

7. If you treat your girlfriend nicely but are rude to waiters and those less fortunate, then you’re still a dick. Doesn’t change a thing.

8. Tip generously. Cheap guys turn girls off.

9. Stop expecting girls to look like supermodels all the time. It’s not like you’re Ryan Gosling yourself.

10. If your pants are tighter than mine, I will never take you seriously.

If you’re a guy who’s crying right now, grow a pair. It’s not like this is as tough (or as long) as the letter to Egyptian girls.